the olympics: discovering hot guys you never knew existed
wentzporta: i’m terrified of growing old don’t ask me about my future i will throw up on you
do you ever want to slap yourself in the face because you know you should be doing something productive but instead you choose to sit in front of a laptop for hours on end doing shit that has no beneficial impact on your life and this just happens day after day after day and still you refuse to accept the fact that you have a problem
If I die and people post statuses about me on facebook and act like they knew me or were nice to me I will come back and fucking murder them.
thequeenofslytherin: 2012 will be over in about 4 months how did this happen
s4ls4: mrsspencereid: it’s kind of ridiculous that we have to work our asses off for 13 years in school just to work our asses off for another 2-8+ years in college just to work our asses off in a job that we probably don’t even like, when we were born on this earth without a choice and i for one certainly didn’t sign up for that this is seriously all i fucking think about
no offense but i want to set you on fire
thneed-ler: DO YOU EVER JUST RECALL A TIME WHEN YOU WERE REALLY, REALLY AWKWARD AND JUST CRINGE AT YOURSELF AND YOUR SOCIAL INTERACTIONS AND JUST OH MY GOD WHY
me: omg yes this is one of my favorite songs ever
other person in the car: talks through the entire song
Me: I won't let it bother me I won't let it bother me I won't let it bother me
Me: *lays down to sleep at night*
Me: It bothers me, actually it really fucking bothers me, so let's lay here and think and stress about it instead of sleeping.
dylinquent: if there’s ever an outbreak of a highly contagious deadly virus it wouldn’t matter to me because I never leave my room
friend: there's a life outside the internet
me: link me
Dad: Why are you eyes so red, son?
Son: I smoked weed, dad
Dad: Don't lie to me, you were crying because you are a faggot
precipitates: My laptop would be much more useful if the heat it gives off melts the fat off my thighs